Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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