hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
