bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Randomize
