People in love make me want to vomit
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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