Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
