I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
