Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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