Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
time to smoke my breakfast
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
