Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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