Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
thus making me awesome and them whores
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
