porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
