Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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