Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
