I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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