It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Please, let me fuck your mom
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Randomize
