Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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