Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
