But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
