it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
These tits shall not be calmed
Can't talk, ducks in the car
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
