you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
