she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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