I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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