I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Send help, water and tortillas.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
