Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
