ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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