I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize