i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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