He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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