So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
