East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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