I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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