He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize