idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
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