she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
