you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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