respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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