Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
She's the barista slut.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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