please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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