Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
