His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
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I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
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Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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