The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
