When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
