we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
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I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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