The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Having a random hookup so left but love u
is wine microwaveable?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Randomize
