I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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