Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
