He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
We're too hungover to prance.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
