I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
