At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
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You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
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There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
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