I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
