I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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