Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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