What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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